View From The Top

May 11, 2011 at 11:27 am Leave a comment

MOVIE:  View From The Top

NUTSHELL:  Small town girl dreams of being a fabulous jet set flight attendant after watching a self-help book guru interviewed on tv. But then she falls in love in Cleveland. Will she choose career or the guy? Is it a cute guy? It’s Mark Ruffalo. Okay, forget I asked.

GOOD THINGS:  Well it’s got that Mark Ruffalo, Candice Bergen, and Gwyneth Paltrow but they’ve got questionable hair (okay, not Ruffalo). Also has Christina “Sidekick Hell Uber Alles” Applegate but she’s wasted and well… just weird. Conchetta “Lila Forever” Tomei and Troy “Bob Pepper Forever” Evans together again! (Not exactly but I can dream, right?)

BAD THINGS:  Possibly one of the worst scripts ever and a very large number of ‘dos that give high hair a bad name, odd stay-at-home-and-cook message and exceptionally flat characters doing ill-advised, unmotivated things. I guess that has to do with the really bad script, doesn’t it? Okay I could go on but let’s get to the cute little soaps.

FEATURES:  Cute little soaps, petty theft, trashy outfits, ill-advised musical numbers, t & a, houseboats, dorm rooms, ubiquitious eye jokes, suspiciously tan rich husbands, Chad Everett (oops, redundant redundant), George Kennedy, Mark Blucas, Stacey Dash, Stephen Tobolowsky, Mike Myers, old buddy Wayne Federman, Rob Lowe, Kelly Preston, Jessica Capshaw – whew that is a whole lot of WASTED people!

UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENTS:  Seriously, how many eye jokes can we stand? Seeing Gwyneth suckerpunched is rather less enjoyable than you’d think.

NOTABLE:  This is a new trend I think – bad movies that don’t get laughs until the blooper reel over the end credits and then everyone goes crazy with relief.

BEST PART:  BLOOPER REEL OVER THE END CREDITS! HAHAHAHAAHA!

BEST LINE:  Welcome aboard.

CROWNS:  1 out of 5

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Entry filed under: Firebaton review.

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