The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe

May 11, 2011 at 10:43 am Leave a comment

MOVIE:  The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe

NUTSHELL:  Four siblings find a portal to another world in the back of a wardrobe. Tedium ensues.

GOOD THINGS:  Voices of Liam Neeson and Rupert Everett

BAD THINGS:  CGI animal torture and widespread live-action, mythical and CGI carnage, HC connotations, heavy-handed this and that-ing

FEATURES:  Small children, Tilda Swinton, Jim Broadbent, scary housekeeper, Turkish Delight, voices of Dawn French and Ray Winstone

UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENTS:  Yes 90% of the film which is at least 10% less than the book

NOTABLE:  This movie has a crazy notion to make wolves an polar bears part of the evildoers which is total rubbish as they are too presh for words.

BEST PART:  Three minutes before the movie started I was the only one in the auditorium and an elderly couple sat two seats away from me. The woman looked at me and I could tell she wanted to sit next to me but my look must have dissuaded her. (Go figure.) Sadly this is much more interesting and weird than anything in the movie.

BEST LINE:  My name is Phillip!

CROWNS:  1 out of 5

Entry filed under: Brits, Firebaton review.

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