Shanghai Knights

MOVIE:  Shanghai Knights

NUTSHELL:  Get it?  Shanghai KNIGHTS?  Sequel to Shanghai NOON but they go to England so instead of Nights it’s KNIGHTS?  GET IT?  Sigh.  A phoned-in sequel to Tom Dey’s wonderful movie and this time there’s a couple good fight scenes and Owen Wilson but that’s about freaking it.

GOOD THINGS:  Jackie Chan, Owen Wilson, a few inspired fight scenes

BAD THINGS:  It’s all just sort of blah but the villain’s changing accent and weird bedhead does keep you on your toes.

FEATURES:  Donnie Yen, Aidan Gillen as Lord Nelson Rathbone (why does that make me giggle?), Fann Wong, Tom Fisher, Gemma Jones, Aaron Johnson, Kim Chan, spotted dick jokes – please spare us

UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENTS:  So many groany, cringy, winking, goony moments that you will wake up screaming.  Okay not exactly but it will make you frown slightly several times.

NOTABLE:  Can you die from anachronisms?  Because if you can we are going to cut our population in half by the time this is released on DVD.

BEST PART:  What are you new?  OWEN WILSON, DUH!

BEST LINE:  I’m am not gonna die hanging from a clock. Oh look, I can see our hotel from here.

CROWNS:  3 out of 5 (2 for Owen, 1 for Jackie Chan)